Dangerous New Hobby

Now you are probably wondering what new hobby I could be starting when I am 7 1/2 months pregnant that would be considered dangerous...making ice cream :) On x-mas this year Bob made homemade peach ice cream and I was in heaven. I am in the process on making my first batch which happens to be chocolate, I have had a small taste and it is amazing! I can't believe more people don't make their own, since I have now done it and found it to be very easy. Maybe a little too easy because I have about a dozen of flavors that I want to make. My next flavor is going to be pineapple, then peach, then maybe a mixed berry? This is where it becomes dangerous because ice cream as you know is not the healthiest treat I could be making.
Peanut butter, brownies, cookie dough...yummm. I think I will have to start giving it as gifts so I can still make and try all the different kinds but not eat it all. Did I mention the chocolate ice cream I am making right now has a hint of cinnamon in it which I wanted to leave out but makes it sooo good. Matt just stuck it in the freezer to get it final hard freeze so I have to go eat dinner then we will go for our walk and then I will let myself eat a small bowl of it...well hopefully small....smallish :)

December

I can't believe that it is already December! I would love to say that we have been busy with getting the house ready for the baby but Matt has hurt his arm so I am still without a bedroom and the baby room seems very far off. I am trying not to worry, tell myself that both of those rooms are wants and not needs...but it hasn't taken yet:) I would love to be putting his room together, he already has so much stuff!
My swelling reach an all time high last week where I could not close my hand, which makes my job (cleaning little kids teeth) kind of hard. So I gave my notice and this Thursday is my last day of work. I am very excited to get into a new routine, so I am trying to embrace my new title of stay at home wife...homemaker...I don't know why but those all make my stomach feel sick. So I will have to think of something more fitting.
The baby is now big enough and strong enough that when he moves my stomach moves too. I love the feeling of his kicks but I have to say the full body rolls are going to take some getting use too because they kind of gross me out. We have not settled on a name yet either. Matt likes to come up with really crazy names that we would never choose so the picking of names is going slow. Also I kind of feel like I need to see him before I can name him.

NASTY

I know, I know I said that I wasn't going to do it (post a picture of my ankle) but I had too. I figure, its better to laugh than to cry. Not that this swelling issue hasn't brought a few tears to my eyes. Oh and yes I am in need of a pedicure too.
This is what I have been dealing with normally on my right side but on a couple of occasion the left side decides to join in the fun. This past Sunday my toes, that are normally pretty stubby looking looked like those small baby hot dogs that no one buys but just laughs at in the baby food aisle.
Now I have spoke with my midwife and as long as my blood pressure don't go up this is all considered healthy. And I have to say that since this has happened my stress level has been way down because I have only been work 2 day a week.
I have an acupuncture appointment, and I can't wait. For me acupuncture ranks up there with a good massage. The baby loves it too with all the good blood flow he kick and play the whole time. It is a blissful hour and a half for me. Oh and it helps with my swelling too.

Worm Bin

I must say that this is probably one of the strangest things that I have done in a while. This past weekend I finally put together my worm bin. I am still in the process of collecting worms because I need about a pound. I could go and buy the rest that I need but, I kind of want to use worms that I find. . why? I am not sure. Collecting the worms or "harvesting" them is my least favorite part. Matt has a board in the back yard that had fallen over and I have found that it is my prime worm hunting ground, all I have to do is go out a couple of times a day and collect. It is pretty easy, most of them are on top of the ground so I just scoop them up and put them in my bin. Sometimes the big ones are only part of the way out of the ground and so you have to pull on them pretty good and they are slimy ...not my favorite part. When this happens I normally try to get Matt involved in harvesting but since he thinks I am slightly crazy for having a worm bin he prefers to watch and laugh.
Now the reason why I have chosen to have a worm bin is for worm castings and tea...to fertilize with. A pound of worms can eat up to a pound of food a day, that is amazing. Matt and I like to compost most of our food but it never turns out so I am going to try a worm bin instead. This summer we plan on growing veggies so I am going to make our own worm castings. Also this is really good practice for having a little boy! I will let you know how it goes, I am hoping that none escape.

Muffin Top Ankles

I am happy to say we are having another little boy. I was sure I was having a little girl and was happily surprised that I was wrong. Our little man weighs a whopping 1 pound 2 ounces right now and is quit the mover. We are not sure of what we are going to name him, boys names are harder for us. Matt has started coming up with some really crazy ones that make me laugh and then shake my head...some times no knowing if he is joking or not. The good news is is that we did figure out what we are going to be for Halloween next year! You have to get the important things out of the way first :) I am going to keep our costumes a secret till next year but I think we will be sending out a Halloween card with a picture.
Oh and yes I have Muffin top ankles. My legs have started swelling, the right more than the left and I have to say its not that fun. First off it looks really gross, I have a picture but don't think I will share it online. Second it freaks Matt out completely. He notice my foot had swelled one sunday, he kept looking at it and poking it like I had grown an extra toe. I kept saying it would be OK but he had that look on his face all day. Today when I was talking to Travis he reminded me that it was OK to have muffin top ankles because the Muffin top was the best part of the muffin.

Thankfull

It 5:18am on Sunday morning, I have been up for the past 2 plus hours or 2 1/2 episodes of LA Ink. Insomnia has become a close friend. During my first pregnancy it showed up almost instantly, so I am not sad to say that it took 5 months to visit me in my second. Normally I would be frustrated at missing some well need sleep but I have to say that this morning I am super excited. For the past couple of hours as I have been tossing and turning on our rock hard couch I have got to feel our baby move more than ever. It is the most amazing feeling and I am happy to say that I can feel my little lemon getting stronger. It has almost been 2 weeks since I felt the first little movement that I was sure was our baby and I have to say that every time it happens I have to give thanks. I was lucky enough to feel Jude move once within me. It is a special moment that I will never forget and always cherish. I can't wait for Matt to be able to feel the baby move, I know he will have one of the biggest smiles I have ever seen on his face.
I have to also mention that I have amazing friends. Last night Becky and Hailey surprised with a bunch a beautiful creative flowers, an amazing super sized chocolate bar and a bottle of bubbly that I can actually drink(sparkling cider with pomegranate). It was great to see them both. I love to show Becky the crazy new things we do to our house, she always has the best reaction and the funniest comments/compliments.Thank You, you guys made my night!

20 weeks tomorrow

Tomorrow I am 20 weeks or 5 months pregnant. I am very excited to be half way through...again. With every new happy milestone that I have in this pregnancy, I have to say that there is a bit of sorrow. Its hard not to think about our little boy. Every week I get a little reminder of how far along I am and what is going on with the baby. This week I was told that the baby should be about 10 inches...Jude was 10inch when I gave birth to him. I have the measuring tape upstairs that they used to measure him with with a small mark next to the 10, we keep it in our memory box of Jude.

I have to say that tonight I am very bitter. I don't want a memory box, I want my baby. I don't want his ashes, I want his crys and laughs. I want to wake up from this horrid dream that has become my life. I don't want to know what it feels like to loose such an important part of you.

I have heard the saying that life only gives you what you can handle. I am not sure if I believe that or not but as I write this and my tears get stronger I feel the little one within me kick and I breath again knowing that I will make it through another day.